Category: Uncategorized

it wasn’t until this morning that i realized what a terribly long day yesterday was. not in that it just drug on and on — well, part of it did — but that it was just so full of stuff, and just went on for a very long time. mathematically, i didn’t realize until today, it actually lasted a whole 22 hours, which is pretty long for a day, i think.

i got up around 7:45 as usual for work. i went to work, and that part did seem to drag. i swore to my coworkers that although it was only 5 in the office (we close at 6), it must be at least saturday afternoon everywhere else in the world, because it seemed to all of us as if time had slowed to a crawl in our vicinity for some reason. it just would not become quitting time.

once i was free though the good stuff began. after darting home to grab some food and pick up my buddy joe, we drove back up to the roxy (which is the building directly next door to my place of business, oddly) and caught the ben kweller/my morning jacket show. boy was that a good one. i don’t believe i’ve heard more than one my morning jacket song, and that one probably only a few times, so that was a great surprise. they were enjoyable and seemed to be enjoying themselves, although i think i would prefer to listen to their music in a rocking chair as opposed to standing in a club, i decided. and during their set there were three girls sort-of in front of me that did an awful lot of jumping up and down and seemed to know all the words to every song, which i thought odd for a band like that. ben kweller was pretty great but his set seemed short. maybe it just flew by because his songs are so good. i’m not sure if i was so into his first selection, covering “i can’t help falling in love with you”, but the rest of the show was grand.

the only drawback was my regrettable social dysfunction. see, this is why i will be single for a long long time: a very attractive girl can be standing a few feet away from me, and i can catch her eye, and we can smile at eachother, and i don’t say anything. but wait, it gets worse. she can end up standing directly next to me later on in the evening, after smiling at me more earlier, and we can be standing there rubbing elbows and swaying against eachother to the music for the entire duration of ben kweller’s set, and i stilldon’t say anything. but wait! it gets much worse! she can end up right in front of me on the slow procession of the crowd out the door, and smile at me basically face to face (which i return); and then once we’re outside waiting to try to say goodbye to someone from our school we ran into at the show, she can be standing alone waiting for someone also only a few feet away; and then once we’re walking down sunset to get back to my car she can stop to get into her car which is parked there at a meter and i can basically brush right past her while we make eye contact . . . and i STILL don’t say anything. how’s that for socially handicapped?

she was great looking too. and at a ben kweller show which is a pretty good headstart on probably turning out to be a cool person, i feel. so it was pretty vital that once we got back here around 1am that i went to a party and started drinking. which turned out to be the best idea i’d had all day and quite fun, and let me talk to a bunch of nice people some of whom were cute girls which did make me feel at least a little better. someday i will learn how not to be a putz, but in the meantime there is vodka. it not only makes girls less intimidating, but it seems to make me want to have deep and personal conversations with my roommate once we get back from the party that go from about 3:30 to 5:30 in the morning. good stuff, but 22 hours is still an awfully long day. today will necessarily be shorter.

[now hearing this: the flaming lips – yoshimi battles the pink robots, which i stand by isn’t as good as soft bulletin or clouds taste mettallic, but which i seem to listen to at least once a day anyway, which i think is a signal that putting out a cd not as good as two masterpieces (in my mind) doesn’t mean it isn’t still fantastic.]

last night, a night of firsts. i got off work and put down a deposit on my first real piece of furniture. i already own a few bookcases/cd shelves which are close, but this time it was a futon. so still the first furniture i can sit/lay/sleep on, which makes it feel more official. we are moving into the house in a week, gotta have that sort of thing around.

also my first trip to an irish pub/restaurant. out in santa monica, california, which seems very unmatched with that style, but it was a good place. i declined the fish and chips and settled in for my first ever pint. only bottles or cans before, which i never really enjoyed. but i have to say my first experience with guinness was much better than previous ones with the american beers which will always remind me of the smell of urine. sorry beer fans. in addition, my first time drinking on a wednesday night before work, although one pint isn’t much to worry about. good times.

sadly though, also the first time it physically hurt me to note how beautiful my ex-girlfriend/current hopefully best-friend/cause of heartbreak/still favorite person in the world — really is. i used to take pleasure in that sort of thing and it’s still great and all, but now it just stings. pretty unfortunate how that works out, i’d say.

it’s worth forging through though to maintain some kind of relationship. i imagine a threefold pain if i were to let her fall out of my life completely, so i should be grateful for the pangs. it’s worth the trouble.

she just looked so attractive…

[now hearing this – pavement – slanted and enchanted, purchased recently for 6 dollars, used, at my personal paradise. i plan to someday, after i become fabulously wealthy, to account for a sizeable percentage of their sales as a single customer. oh, and this is a really good cd i’m embarrassed i didn’t own it before.]

less worth sharing than usual. work is decent. life is coasting along. i’m playing it cool.

and things are alright for now, which is enough for today. just taking it easy and trying to stay afloat.

briefly –

another beach trip yesterday. slightly sunburned, but a great time. got the best parking spot ever.

another trip to amoeba yesterday. new flaming lips not as good as soft bulletin. too much electronic noises. still excellent though. in love with the song “do you realize??”

another boring sunday. might take a trip to the futon shop to check out future bedding/couching options and their impact on my pocketbook.

another song of the week. save a life from hey mercedes. cannot wait for the rocktastic pairing of their show with piebald’s. i’ve seen both before and both bands just know damn well how to have fun on a stage. two nights in a row and i’d go back for more if they didn’t have to move on to other locales.

enjoy your day. enter the xXx essay contest (see below). that should be fun.

[now hearing this: hey mercedes – the weekend e.p. from whence the song of the week has come. you should really buy this. bonus track/cover song is just terrific.]

some pretty funny stuff can happen at work. sure, no one else in the office might appreciate the humor the way i do, or maybe they have sense enough to keep it to themselves, but i had some good laughs at least twice today.

the first was at this guy that works in our office. he’s a black guy with dreadlocks, a little shorter than me and bulkier too. not fat, just meatier than me. that’s not much of a feat though really. anyway, he’s a pretty okay dude generally. no friction there.

but today i walked in and went to my desk, situated myself, etc. after about 20 minutes or so, i got up to get some water as i normally do, and noticed this time, since the dude was standing up instead of sitting behind the big front desk/counter, what he was wearing today. i was able to contain myself initially, but that was pretty difficult in the face of a grown man wearing a black, sleeveless v-neck made of velvet. yes, VELVET. yes, sleeveless v-neck. i had to rush around the corner to keep from laughing right at him though, and share my laughter with the other intern. i asked her if she’d seen the guy’s outfit today, and how it was pretty funny that he decided to dress like a trapeze artist before coming in to work today. i think he might have heard me though — i have this problem with not whispering when i should. might be related to my hearing damage from rock concerts. but anyway, i spent the day wondering if he was pissed at me because i told the other girl how stupid he looked.

and the second thing that cracked me up is much funnier than that. see, at work we keep track of what companies do what promotions with what movies. so i was checking out the contests associated with xXx today, and nearly bust a nut when i came across this one. that’s right kids, enter now to win a trip to the filming of the xXx sequel (already a green-lit project, you’ll be glad to hear) for four nights, brought to you by the starz movie channel, in the XXX ESSAY CONTEST!

i swear i didn’t make that up! there’s an essay contest for this movie! can you imagine? i’m sure the response will be overwhelming, too, because i know that most of the vin diesel fans i know have stacks of creative writing laying around their studies, and are dying for a constructive outlet for their literary prowess. and who couldn’t wax poetic on the great topic of “your most Xtreme Xperience”, and in 50 words or less! that’s not so much an essay as a brief paragraph. i mean, i’ve used 102 words in this paragraph alone up to this point. obviously only the very best writers will stand a chance, because they’ll have to practice such strict economy of language in their Xtreme masterpiece! and i wonder if exclamation points count as a word or not?…

well since i would love more than anything to win this trip and the acclaim associated with this literary recognition, i have actually chosen to make my own submission to the “Xperience of your lifetime” contest. i have shared it with you below, but you have to promise not to steal it and win the fabulous prizes for yourself (runners up get signed movie posters from the vin-meister himself! what a hunk!).

brian’s entry to the “what was your most Xtreme Xperience?” essay contest, which will definitely score him a free xXx baseball hat and probably make him famous eventually too:

first i must ask myself: what is xtreme?

catching the sickest air?

busting the fattest trick?

or does it really matter, as long as i keep it real?

one thing’s for sure. i’m sure not as xtreme as vin diesel.

i mean, he’s pretty much the dope shit.

(cars exploding).

pretty tight, huh? it was sort of missing something (and only added up to 48 words) until i added that last line. now i think it’s pure gold and you suckers are gonna wish you had found out about this contest before i did.

maybe after i win and visit the set, they’ll realize how xtreme i really am and i’ll get to be vin’s sidekick in the next movie. oh man would that be sweet. i can see the tv commercials now:

vin: i live for this sh–

fast cut to brian

me: it sure is xtreme in here!

heh heh. pure gold.

[now hearing this: ben kweller – sha sha. not really xtreme, but i still hope that his show at the roxy doesn’t sell out before i get paid and can afford tickets.]

did you know that golf has an official mascot? he’s a big goofy golfball with arms and legs, wearing green plaid pants and a green plaid golfing hat, and sporting some serious scottish mustache/eyebrow action. his name is billy mcgolf (i’m telling you, that golfy mcgolf joke would have been more fun), and he’s supposed to be helping kids get more interested in the game at a younger age.

the only problem is if you go to the website, they don’t play up the fun aspect of the game at all. nevermind that you’re whacking the hell out of a little ball: the flash intro has slogan’s like “it’s fun to play by the rules” sliding across the screen, along with words like “integrity” and “etiquette” . . . what the hell is that? what kid, if he even knows what those are yet, is going to be drawn to a game where the selling point is being polite? or that brags about how fun it is to play by the rules? it’s like they want kids to start being boring old men before they’ve even started growing facial hair (to look just like their hero, billy mcgolf!).

they also have a billy mcgolf version of whack-a-mole, and golf tips for kids, written very accessibly for the age group, with phrases like “i’ve challenged myself to be sportsmanlike and courteous…”

man, that sounds fun.

[now hearing this: canned sounds of kids going “yaaaaay!” on the billy mcgolf site…both creepy and funny.]

ooooh, sweet frustration. but this time i’m talking about something different. see, i thought i’d roll out of work at six, get to amoeba, and have to hang around a while killing time before the flaming lips’ set at 7. whatever, i can deal, it’s amoeba. i could probably browse for 5 hours if i had to.

but that changed when i checked their site again this afternoon, which now said the set was at 6pm. dammit. so i get to leave at 6 on the dot and try to rush through traffic way down sunset to ameoba, park, and get in as fast as i can. of course, i hadn’t really considered, for some reason, that i would get there, park, a few streets over, walk around to the front, and see a fat line going around the other side, while i hear the set already underway inside. or that i’d wait in line for half an hour while they only let in as many people as come out — and who would come out during the flaming lips? — until i find out the set’s over and they’re signing now but most of the people are leaving. so all i got to do for my trouble was walk in, walk past the signing table and see them, and then leave again, because i didn’t have money to buy a cd and i didn’t want to risk getting a ticket for staying too long since i was unsure of the parking situation on the street i’d left my car.

what a disappointment. the only thing i came away with was a stupid sheet of 5 little stickers promoting filter’s new record amalgamut (in stores july 2002). i mean holy jesus, what a consolation.

damn letdowns.

[now hearing this: hey mercedes, appearing live in only two weeks in this sunny southern city. woo ha.]

not much to share today. i did get free in-n-out for lunch though for being the sucker who drove down the street to get it. well worth it, i assure you. oh, and on another note, the flaming lips are doing an in-store at amoeba tomorrow night for their new album release, and i’m stoked about that for sure. sucks i don’t have any money to actually buy the cd tomorrow though. i’m hoping to just bring my copy of clouds taste metallic and get that signed, and promise to get the album next week when the paycheck comes. it’s only fair.

anyway, i did want to change the song of the week, although it’s almost a shame because last weeks was so perfect. i mean, a fantastic song, and so fitting for right now, for me.

but instead i will share one of the new tracks from the stereo that makes the new disc worth hearing, or maybe buying. i still like no traffic better, but this song sure does have a great riff running through it. and can you ever really have enough pop-rock songs about lost love? i don’t really think so. so here’s 1994 by the stereo — dig it.

brian last year: “no way. i don’t need to drink to have a good time. i’ll just drink this soda and be comfortable with who i am, and not need chemicals to alter my mind as a way to escape myself and have a good time.”

brian last night: “tequila body shots? that sounds fun, count me in.”

sometimes you have these flashes that you really are growing up and changing as a person, and it’s both frightening and satisfying. all the things that a while back you swore you’d never do — or maybe swore you’d always do no matter how old you got — turn out not to matter nearly as much to you as they did then. you come to understand that telling yourself you wouldn’t change was pretty foolish, when you think about it, because there’s so much bound to happen that it’s utterly ridiculous to assume you could stay the same at all.

the core of brian has been pretty consistent for years, which i’m pretty proud of having found early on; and i think is why i manage to be a pretty steadily happy person (forget the getting dumped part, that was out of my control). still, there’s a lot wrapped around that core that’s always switching around, but you know what that’s good, because if it didn’t i bet no one would like me — i’d get boring while everyone else grew up. maybe all the scary responsibility coming up on the horizon will be good fuel to make me a really interesting person, as long as i keep the core brian just plowing through it all. probably, all the things that bog me down now will be what i take pride in having been through later on. that’s what i’m going to hope for now because i am an optimistic kid.

and speaking of cores, i still eat them when i have an apple because i don’t want to get up and throw them away when i’ve finished the rest. the essence of brian, right there. take note.

[now hearing this: the stereo – rewind + record. my verdict, i think, is “not quite as good as no traffic, but i stand by him/them, and there are a couple really good tracks, and i’ll still buy a ticket to see them when they come around in august. nighty night.]

you know, if you set aside the fact that this was week one of being recently dumped, it turned out surprisingly well. thursday i missed work for the warped tour at the nearby LA coliseum (it was actually in the walkway and parking areas surrounding the sports arena, not at the coliseum at all as advertised, but whatever, you know?). that was a good day. i saw some pretty solid (albeit abbreviated) sets from midtown, hot water music, ozma, thursday, finch, rx bandits, alkaline trio, and fragments of a few others too. catching flogging molly play a couple songs was great, although possibly more entertaining was listening to the (irish? scottish? not sure.) singer yell at the crowds in between songs with his thick accent, screaming things like, “alright ya bastards!” but still managing to sound really friendly while doing it. another plus was that during ozma’s set on one of the two side-by-side main stages, which were separated by some semi-trailers and stuff, we were surprised by motocross bikers suddenly shooting into the sky and pulling stunts in the blank sky between the two backdrops. it was fucking awesome! apparently there was a ramp/track set up running parallel to the backs of the two stages, so not only were we watching a great band play, but all these insane bikers were flying through the sky just back and to the right of the musicians. it was nuts. a very satisfying combination and fun spectacle though.

last night the boss decided we should all leave the office at 4:30 to go have margaritas, which i was fine with, since he paid for the pitchers, the parking, and i got some mighty tasty complimentary chips and fresh salsa. this job is so much better than last year, and not even because our boss is into drinking with us. too bad that i could only have one so i could be fine to drive home around 6:15 though; those were some tasty (and strong) drinks. and with my recent snags in being cheerful, i would have liked a few more… ah well.

this is the part most relevant to you though probably: go see road to perdition. we went out to catch that last night, and it was terrific. i liked it a lot. i feel bad that the director has to try to follow up american beauty with something as good, since it’s only his second film, because it’s not as good as that. but it’s still the best movie i’ve probably seen this year. it could be my weakness for things involving tommyguns, but i’m pretty sure it was the great cinematography and the great storyline that makes me urge all of you to go see road to perdition. it’s just a really beautiful movie and if you go see anything in the next few weeks it really ought to be that (although i can understand if it’s reign of fire. dragons are just badass).

today, a beautiful beach day and tonight a big house party out of town. there’s a pool. there’s a jacuzzi. supposedly many ladies have been notified. we’ll see what i can do with all of that.

[now hearing this: braid – lucky to be alive because i had “breathe in” stuck in my head all last night. i kept singing “maaaariiiiiigoooooold!” out loud and i had to try to put that to rest.]