Author: briancollapsing

tried to post earlier, but the blogger was not available. not to worry, all i was going to post was a short apology that i’d lived such a boring day i had nothing to talk about. gave a couple decent group presentations at school today (i had to wear a tie. although they’re not comfortable, i do feel sexy, so it’s not so bad), and came home. nothing remarkable.

i’m feeling all restless tonight though because i was telling dom and dustin about the absolutely gorgeous girl in my art class, who was in my group presenting, and who sat right in front of me in class, and who i’m insanely crushing on. now i’ve got girl-craziness and i can’t quite get into studying for my finance midterm. i don’t want to sit here in my room doing homework problems, i want to be out and bump into her coincidentally and finally start a conversation with her so i can see what she’s like. because i think i’ve pinpointed what is bad about being single. the potential for exciting new relationships is good, and the freedom is good, but again potentially. the bad thing is not having anyone on whom to focus your efforts, emotionally. if you get in that mood where you want to be around someone you’re interested in, you don’t really have anywhere to turn, unless you’re already in the process of courting someone. otherwise, your only option is to just go out somewhere hoping to meet someone, which i’ve never done and can’t see happening. so what happens is you’re stuck at home all frustrated and restless, like i am now, with nothing you can really do about it.

if you’re not single, this is never a problem because there’s someone out there you can either go see, or at least know is out there and not have to get this frustration of having no leads to pursue. as i see it, the key problem isn’t having no special girl or guy; it’s not having access to any potential girls or guys. and sometimes, that’s all you want. that’s my theory.

of course, maybe this just means i’m not comfortable being single, which some may see as a problem. i’d rather not dwell on that for too long. we’ll come back to that. just chalk it up to a little bout of post-breakup loneliness, maybe. that’s normal, right?

hey, looks like i did have something to talk about.

oh, i had nearly forgotten to remark on the fact that i finished good omens yesterday. what a pleasant read that was. it wasn’t the most moving work of literature, but it was just such a joy to pick up and read. very sharp, and sort of touching. i liked it a whole lot.

now it’s on to about a boy, from the author of high fidelity, nick hornby. based on the first 50 or so pages of this book and having read high fidelity, i’m pretty convinced that this author is the master of making you laugh and breaking your heart in the same story. you might think it’s tricky to do both, and maybe it is, but he sure seems quite capable. i really like it so far. some of the parts about the school boy being taunted by the other kids cut to the core though, so don’t expect too lighthearted a romp. it’s pretty emotional, especially for geeks who can relate.

also: listening to the new end original cd has not diminished my enjoyment of their music. a couple songs i think were better live, and it’s not the best cd i’ve picked up recently, but it is certainly a solid piece of emotional rock and roll with a few soft pretty places in between. i’m listening to it right now. good stuff.

in class right now. the project i finished last monday to turn in this monday is apparently not due until next monday because the rest of the class isn’t as sharp as your captain here. oh well, i’ll take the brownie points for turning it in today; at least it’s done.

why is this the coldest computer lab in the history of the universe? i swear they’re storing embryos in this building somewhere because it’s unbelievably cold in here, and my tee shirt isn’t providing the insulation necessary to keep me from shivering occasionally. and i’m in southern california in the middle of the day, it’s probably like 80 degrees outside. what the hell.

today was filled with homework so i haven’t much to tell, although i have a finished marketing group project and a pretty good paper on jainism vs. hinduism. so that’s good.

this is interesting though, and i forgot to mention it yesterday: i saw bob sagat. yes, i’m serious. tv’s bob saget was on our campus this weekend, discussing scleroderma, a disease his sister died of, at the LA times health and fitness festival held on our school grounds. it was so bizarre, hearing this guy who was on full house talk about a debilitating disease. and he made some sort of inappropriate jokes too. what a weird guy. i also saw tv’s larry king talking to tv’s chuck woolery (host of the love connection) about aneurysms. hot dog! oh, and we’re pretty sure we also saw george carlin driving a ferrari in the lane next to ours on the freeway that same afternoon. i’m not kidding.

what a weird place i live in.

and speaking of weird, i got a postcard from australia from my friend josh. what a great guy! of course, instead of having a neat picture of any of the beautiful or memorable sights from down under, he sends a postcard with a picture of two guys riding camels that says “camels central australia.” on the front. umm… okay. but turn it over to hear about his exciting times down there, at least, and stare again in wonder, because what does the note say? a bunch of stuff about seeing camels in australia.

damn you josh.

but i still have to say, i miss you buddy.

freshly returned from the grocer’s, but you don’t want to hear about that. you’d much rather have me tell you about the new end original concert i went to before i went to get root beer and ice cream at ralph’s. so i’ll indulge you. first there was a band called red light halo which i’d never heard of and who played some songs i really like, until their equipment failed during song 4 and one guitar player was silenced. they had to just give up because he couldn’t figure out what went wrong with his gear. i was sad, they were in the middle of impressing me when that happened.

i must say, i really really enjoyed hearing and seeing new end original play. a colleage said afterward that he though jonah (singer) was arrogant and thought he was so great but wasn’t assertive enough to make you believe it. i thought the opposite. i get the impression he’s the most earnest, sweetest guy to play in a band in front of a crowd. he does the whole, “i’m sensitive and i love you guys for wanting to hear me play” thing that stupid dashboard guy does, but from jonah i believe it and it makes me happy. and the songs were good, because he has a fantastic voice, and writes interesting, pretty songs, and the band really knows how to rock when it comes down to it. a good mix of soft and touching with aggressive and pounding that hit the spot for me. i hope listening to the cd, which i bought at the show, is equally satisfying.

now i have to put forth a theory. the last few indie rock type shows i’ve gone to, as i’m looking over the crowd around me, i tend to notice attractive indie girls. it seems to me, though, that all the girls at these shows either are with a) their boyfriend, making them unavailable to me, or b) in a group of other girls that are putting off the definite girls-only, not-interested-in-anyone vibe. so does that mean that all the cute indie rock girls are either taken or don’t want to be? i keep hoping i’ll meet some great girl at a show and it’ll be perfect, because i’ll already have the head-start of knowing she was cool enough to want to see that band and we have similar music tastes, but that wish has never ever been anywhere close to coming to fruition. it’s sort of depressing.

at least the band are usually really good; i’m not pathetic, i swear.

saturday morning. well, afternoon technically, but i slept pretty late.

we did make it to zoolander last night, although my first comment is never ever go to a general cinemas theatre. 9 dollar tickets, and no student discount? that’s unacceptable. i’m certainly never going back there again. never ever.

as for the movie, well, it wasn’t really worth nine dollars. it would have been worth seeing for free a few weeks ago at the pre-screening, if that hadn’t been cancelled to remove world trade center shots from the film. as it stands, the fair price for that movie is probably somewhere between the two at maybe 5 or 6 dollars. it wasn’t a good movie. it was funny, and i laughed plenty here and there, so it was enjoyable. ben stiller is a funny guy. overall though there were a lot of things wrong with it, for example a plot line with his father that served no point and delivered almost no humor.

i guess you can’t win ’em all.

later i did some relaxin’ at the pad and strolled with a friend over to 7-11 and picked up a snickers ice cream bar. mmm, yummy. on the way in, there was a possibly-homeless, and if not at least very weird and crazy guy on the corner of the street we had to cross toward, and he was demonstrating some kung fu type punches for us apparently as we tried to take a wide path around him; i wanted a snack, but i wasn’t about to break out the fists of fury just to get 99 cents worth of empty calories. anyway, he mumbled something at us as we passed, and i turned and gave him what i called the “respectful-distance nod” to at least acknowledge the guy. i figure crazy people don’t want to think they’re being ignored, so just let them know you noticed them but don’t want to rumble. needless to say, on the way out, kung-fu master had crossed a different street and was at the gas station opposite. i remarked to my friend, no one messes with the respectful-distance nod.

okay, i just read this from a link on shiner’s home page. you should check it out, they’re talking about their new album (october 23rd will be the best new music day of the year, hands down, when you add hey mercedes and d-plan on top of shiner) and you can listen to a couple of the new songs in real audio.

the real reason i mention it is this though. i laughed my head off:

“What sets The Egg apart from previous Shiner records is its exploration of sounds and structure; many of the songs having an ethereal quality that seems to tie them together. Although “The Truth About Cows” and “Surgery” bring the rock like always, the middle five tracks (beginning with “The Egg”) are darker, more expansive and seem to be thematically linked, almost like a concept album.

“There’s no, like, fucking gnomes or wizards or anything like that,” Malinowski is quick to add. “Musically, it’s concept-linked.”

oh man. gnomes and wizards. that’s outstanding.

mission control by burning airlines is a cd i could listen to all day. i was playing it at work and it made me so happy. not because it’s a cheerful cd, i don’t mean that kind of happy. it’s just an amazing album and it lights up the part inside me that appreciates excellently crafted music. this cd is definitely an example of that.

hoping to check out zoolander tonight, which would be fun. if that doesn’t happen i have a bad feeling nothing will be going on. tomorrow night new end original is playing only a few blocks from here, so i’m gonna check that out i think. i’m anxious to see if the two parts which i really like, but in two very different ways (one being the guitars from texas is the reason, another being the touching songs and singing of jonah), combine to a sum greater than the parts, or if they don’t work out as well together. all i’ve heard is the three song single, which i like. three songs don’t make a show though. so i’ll report back sunday on that.

the more pressing issue though is what to have for dinner. and even more frighteningly: i’m completely out of root beer. send help!

back from a little party at “the spencer” (an apartment complex my friend lives in). i want to live somewhere with a good name like that. who wants to live in a building called “founders’ apartments”? that’s pale. but not only was the building well-named, but a swell time was had. it’s a promising thing, hanging out with a crowd comprised mostly of people you don’t know very well, and having a good time anyway. gives me hope that maybe there are additional friends to be made in the world.

plus, i got to hang out with justin, who is metal (he also has a monday night radio show, but later and scarier) and also rocks in a non-music way. yeah, that’s right justin, i mentioned you AND linked to your metal militia webpage.

(see, justin’s a collapsing fan too.)

jared at entropy is the man; first reader to get the title reference, or at least first one to vocalize it. he’s got him a fine weblog as well.

rocking the qbert again, doing some laundry, considering the possibilities for this fine thursday evening. i’d like to see zoolander maybe, if someone with a car would like to go too. i don’t care what you say, i’ll support ben stiller to the very end.

there was a career fair on campus today, with long rows of tables between nearly-graduated students and representatives from hiring companies, each one displaying a little sign with the company name and the “desired majors”. although it’s somewhat reassuring that a large majority of them wanted “BUAD”, (that’s me, alright), it put me into a gloomy mood anyway. i hadn’t thought to participate in the career fair because i’m just a junior, but it’s not far off and pretty intimidating. so i went to work and got all introspective about how my life is going to change drastically one way or another in about a year and a half, and i’m very close to the part of my life where i’m going to have to shape that change into what i want it to be, or end up very unhappy. for now i’ll put a lid on complaining about having to join the real world though because that’s so your-typical-college-student’s-malaise, which i don’t want to be a part of. to be honest, i’m excited despite any anxious or nervous underlying feelings.

on a brighter note, later in the day i was passing by the now-vacant career fair tables and ran into a girl named janelle i know, who happens to work for the career center and was probably coming back from helping close up the event. we talked for a few minutes and she said something about how so many people are looking for business majors, which of course invoked little excitement from me, since i’m not so into being known as “one of those”. more importantly though, she said to me, “you should be an author, not a business major… you just seem like the kind of person that i’d like to read what you think about things”. and she’s an english major, so that was an extra nice thing to hear (and it was probably more articulate in her actual words). sincerely though, i think that was an extremely flattering comment. isn’t that what we all want, in some part of us, is for people to want to hear what we have to say? it made me feel good, in any case.

so i told her that maybe i could become one in my spare time while i worked at some regular job to make a living. i also referred her to this webpage, where anyone could technically do just what she said — read what i think about things.

so if she ever ends up here: hi janelle. you’re rad.