not news to most culturally current people, but we have recently discovered that lost is indeed a terribly engrossing show. frustrating in its incessant not-answering of questions, probably. even more so in its characters’ baffling tendency to not ask seemingly obvious questions in the heat of the moment, which would easily untangle the latest mystery if asked, certainly. but at the very least, you always want to see more.

one scene a few episodes into season two had us laughing uncontrollably at its sheer sloppiness though. either someone didn’t read the script correctly, or characters were transposed and never fixed, or they said fuck it, it’s more convenient this way, let’s just go for it, and i have to share. i’ll do it in code though to not spoil anything big for non-viewers.

so, there is a couple, ms A and mr B, and another dude, mr C. at one point, mr B and mr C go on a trip to try to get help. they’re not expected back any time soon.

things don’t quite turn out, so B and C end up heading back to camp. in this scene, mr C is the first to arrive, and he’s in a lot of stress, and appears very suddenly to ms A, the first person to see him and realize they’ve returned. he’s worked up, but reassures ms A that mr B is fine, and goes on to do some other things in a very rushed, tense manor.

later in the episode, mr B finally makes it back to the camp, and the whole crowd welcomes him back from his dangerous journey. they’re so happy to see him, and it’s one of those swelling music moments. but where is ms A? she’s on the beach doing laundry. not following mr C around asking about mr A. not waiting patiently at the edge of the jungle to see him return. calmly doing her chores, and suddenly pleasantly surprised to see her man return. tearful romantic reunion, etc.

what the fuck happened with this scene? if anyone else out of the dozen main characters could have been that first person to see mr C come back, and it would have made sense that ms A was on the beach for that surprise reunion with mr B. and if it had to be ms A who first saw mr C return, how could she possibly be the absolute last person in the camp to see mr B finally come back too?

once i pointed this out to jessica we laughed our way through the rest of the slow-motion, circling-camera embrace that followed, it was so absurd. it’s extra funny that a show entirely about intricacies could have missed such a glaring detail, but i guess when you’re mapping out a whole crazy 7-year mystery, some of the minor points are bound to get glossed over.

my current theory is that the butler did it, and it turns out the butler was a palm tree someone made angry way back in the pilot episode, and the palm tree only exists in the dream of baby jesus, but hey, we’re barely getting started, so who knows.