two.points.collapsing

i know that on your birthday you’re supposed to get insanely out of control and drink til you can’t remember how old you are now, but i didn’t. i’m sorry. i was just having such a damn find time at our party, i didn’t get around to drinking that heavily. i kept mixing cocktails and taking too long to finish them because i was having so many great conversations and enjoying myself so much i didn’t even think to down any more drinks than i would if we hadn’t spent hundreds of dollars on the supplies.

i have to say thanks to everyone who came though; i honestly haven’t had that purely good a time in ages, and it was a gorgeous birthday weekend. i’m still smiling just thinking about it. maybe i wasn’t while i was scrubbing cranberry-vodka stains out of the carpet sunday morning, but that’s just a minor glitch in an otherwise rosy memory.

well, that and finding that of the dozens of guests and loads of saleable goods in our apartment, for some reason the only thing some special weirdo saw fit to steal during our party were the two bottles of cologne from my medicine cabinet. to that person i say good luck; i can’t say that those fragrances ever made a successful contribution to my fortunes with women, and perhaps for you they will be a be a better catalyst. happy hunting!

(and ps: if anyone wants to send a late birthday present, i have a new suggestion.)

[now hearing this: the last episode of the shield season one dvd. pretty fucking good.]

well well well, today is the big day, my 23rd birthday. how will i spend it? let’s see, it’s noon and so far i’ve talked on the phone with my lovely friend shannon amidst a few rounds of playing max payne 2. both were really fun — she’s doing super well, and i shot up a lot of bad guys. she’s sort of my inspiration to push ahead in this year’s dating game, since she’s got a serious boyfriend she likes so much and who’s so handsome and all that. i’d like to think i can do just as well for myself; besides, there will always be that little twinge of ‘i can’t let her win!’ attitude no matter how mature i am most of the time about it. nothing but love though, i’m just jealous she’s so set up and i’m still working on the romantic part.

the remainder of the afternoon will probably be of the relaxing pre-party variety. do a little light cleaning and putting away of easily-breakables. read a little. decide what delicious cocktails we want to buy and then go buy things to make them with, pour them into, keep them cool, and possibly munch on between them, so i don’t throw up after several rounds of drinking them. and probably dinner with the best friends who show up early before the rest of the crowd gathers.

i have to say yesterday was a pleasant surprise, birthday-wise. my team at work was all super-nice, and my bosses got me gifts they definitely were under no obligation to get. and the whole crew went out for a birthday/chinese new year lunch which was a lot of fun. it was a really good day and i have to say as far as my job goes, i’m pretty satisfied. birthdays seem to have a similar evaluative effect as do new years, but since that was so recent i think they got split, with the 1st being a time to plan on personal changes, and the 24th being a time to realize i’m in a great place career-wise, so at least i’ve got a piece of the pie figured out.

you know, i wish i had some birthday pie. hear that everybody? someone bring me a birthday pie tonight. all this pie talk has made me hungry. i meant this to be a quick ‘it’s my birthday!’ post but look at all this introspection — perhaps some lunch will straighten me out. don’t forget to come to the party tonight if you’re in the hood.

[now hearing this: hey mercedes, who really ought to have dragged wheat out to the west coast to keep touring with them this year, but noooooooo, we’ll probably get saves the day again. WEAK.]

busy week. every waking moment has been somehow occupied by activity or errand or guest. not that i’m complaining. although no one’s a huge fan of working until 10pm when they have a new book at home they were hoping to start. this one’s a detective story!

and speaking of reading, i have to say that i love harper’s magazine quite a lot. it’s a nice way to fill in the gaps of my mostly-novelized-fiction reading diet with a few needed vitamins and minerals, i.e. political and social commentary, short fiction. but does anyone else have what i would call magazine guilt? i love reading the thing so much, but obviously it sometimes gets laid aside in favor of books, with me fully intending to pick it back up another day. time passes. then, like a few days ago, the next issue shows up, and i haven’t even gotten past the reader mail from last month’s copy! where did those four weeks go? and now it’s like i’m reading on a deadline because i don’t want to let down my precious literary periodical, because i do care, really i do! just give me a chance to make it up to you! i’ll read this month’s issue before next month’s even hits the presses, much less gets mass-mailed to my tiny apartment postal box. i will! you’ll see!

speaking of which, last month’s index said that the second highest source of income in mexico is money sent home from immigrant US workers. so does that make ‘income’ one of mexico’s biggest imports?

[now hearing this: spoon — aren’t they about due for some new stuff?]

alright i sort of fell off over the weekend. but it was a long, lovely one filled with fun and not so much with computers. i went out every night wednesday through sunday, so please forgive me. i went to a hollywood party where i was arms length from paris hilton making out with nick carter from the backstreet boys, after which i couldn’t get into my valet-parked car and had to sleep on a coworker’s couch, borrow one of his shirts so it wasn’t too obvious i hadn’t been home since the day before, then get a ride from someone else after work to retrieve my poor vehicle. i went on two dates that were lengthy and interesting. i tried to arrange another but haven’t yet. i made birthday party invitations (check them out because my roommate’s the great artist behind them, but you should also come to the party), i won at poker, i saw lost in translation again and loved it even more, i had one of the best burgers i’ve ever tasted in my life, i finished a video game and a book both of which have taken too long, and i’m about to start another of each. i slept in, felt great, and went to work today relaxed as could possibly be.

oh, and i also got a haircut after six months of wild, unchecked growth. my hair had never been so long in my life, and i was starting to look pretty emo — all mopey and shaggy but kind of cute at the same time (see figure 1). but you should have seen what it was like when i came home and the untamed beast of my coif fully reared its ugly head. it was scary and out of control (see figure 2), so i had to finally do something about it. then, after a long hard day of hacking and trimming away, i finally stood a handsome, freshly shorn and upright citizen again that might even pass as respectable (see figure 3). gotta look hot for that birthday party this weekend.

figure 1	figure 2
figure 3

oh and to officially finish off all that long-winded and overdue best of 2003 crap, here are a few stragglers that needed to be put down for the record. thanks, 2003, for not really sucking at all, in retrospect.

best radio single: ‘hey ya’ by outkast — i’m pretty sure i don’t know a single person who doesn’t love this song. if i did i would shake them like a polaroid picture until they saw it my way.

best fun adventure: spring break road trip. vegas-salt lake city-boise-portland-san francisco-los angeles in just as many days and with all my favorite people almost. perhaps unbeatable, although i will certainly try.

best purchase: my new laptop or my mountain bike, not sure which but both great for different reasons.

best drinking story: wrestling with joe in our gravel backyard for some reason for a really long time and slinging scenester insults while performing various leglocks and getting very very dusty and dirty.

best drinking lesson: don’t puke in the bed, it’s gross.

best new TV show: arrested development — holy shit, if you don’t watch this show you’re a moron. best thing on non-cable tv without a doubt. my roommate and i are hopelessly devoted to it, so if you want to come over on sunday night you’re welcome to bask in the glory with us. we have a hard time understanding how something so hilarious and good made it onto a major network.

best way to end a best of list: assuring that normal blogging will resume soon and all this boring nonsense is over until next year.

[now hearing this: appropriately, ‘yesterday’ by the beatles.]

[addendum: sloppy blogging i guess. must have been that single coors light i had last night — silver bullet right through the brain. anyhow, i fixed the wayward tags on both the best-of link and the pay day song link. all is well. or should be. funny how one misplaced word can make a whole webpage turn invisible.]

it’s thursday and i’m in a great mood. went to a fun lawrence arms/the ghost show last night to meet up with a girl who turned out to be as cute as i remembered, thankfully. we originally met before thanksgiving and only yesterday managed to find a time to see eachother again — i had honestly begun to doubt if i would even recognize her. but it went well and i think i will see her sooner than two months from now this time.

and tonight i’ve got plans to get trashed courtesy of stuff magazine with some coworkers. i love when publications wining and dining my coworkers trickles down to little old me.

so to further my good mood, how about some goodies? like this hilarious comic from the LA weekly a few weeks back. i love the one with scott baio. or how about a new pay day song finally? it’s the first two tracks from the cursive album i picked as 2003’s best cd. they kind of need to go together to work, so i did a little CoolEditing and now they are one: the ugly organist/some red handed slight of hand. oh, and let’s not forget the near-end to the best of 2003, the best movies. i’ll give you a hint: vin diesel is, surprisingly, absent from this year’s list.

best movies of 2003

did i happen to mention my birthday is a week from saturday? oh no? well guess what? that’s right, you are absolutely free to send gifts in the form of electronic gift certificates, cash donations, physical packaged presents (email if you need an address to send the strippers to). and i guess i’d accept just plain birthday notes as well. but if you’re only excuse is not being able to think of anything there’s a gift box of suggestions in the sidebar on the right. let’s see if we can’t make 23 the best year yet, eh? those resolutions might help, and as it turns out i might be going out with two different girls two nights this week. both at least slightly older than me. one a coworker. and it’s only week 3 of 52 — not bad for an old dog, eh? well i guess we’ll see afterward. i’ll let you know. in the meantime, let’s get one step closer to kissing last year goodbye with part three of best of 2003…

best books i read in 2003

best line out of this issue of vice magazine, from the article on using cyanide to capture tropical fish for sale as pets:

“With 65 tons of cyanide getting sprayed on a single Philippine reef every year, these “fishermen” are killing the ocean, all the fish, and even the mermaids and ghosts from shipwrecks”.

goddamn, that’s funny.

i can’t believe i came home after working until 10pm, and still used my only two free waking hours to update a website. is that more or less depressing than if i had come home and drank alone? well either way, here’s part two of best of 2003 week…

best live shows of 2003

well, i did it just like i planned, which i find impressive. last year it took me almost until february. but to conserve space and not make it seem too overwhelming, it seemed best to spread them out over the whole week, and put tehm into cute little popup windows. that way you don’t have to even bother if you don’t care, and i can still pop on here and tell a quick story if i have to without taking up too much space. so here’s part one of best of 2003 week, just click below to check it out.

best music of 2003