two.points.collapsing

finance is fucking OVER! done done done never ever ever will i have to deal with that class again. fuck yeah. i came home from finance and sang “fuck finance” in a nice mock-opera voice and danced a happy dance.

sorry about all the cursing but i just feel it’s appropriate here and now. i’ll be nice again though.

so i came back from that test feeling spectactular to have it behind me. and i also obliterated my early test for asian religions. even the dreaded 8am test cannot phase me. i think i may have got a perfect on that one, saving any dumb mistakes. we’ll see i guess. so honestly i’m already in a spectacular mood. add to that the fact that it’s hey mercedes night and i’m through the roof with happiness. what a good night this will be for me.

if only my best friends weren’t leaving in 3 days for a whole semester. what? i’ve already said how sad that makes me? well i should shut up then. let’s not dwell, brian.

on to more cheerful (sort of) matters. like the song of the week! hell yeah. this one fits my feeling right now completely. i came back from that godawful last few hours of finance/hell, and what’s the first song i played? this one. it just had to be done. it was a feeling of excitement seated deep in my gut that could only be exorcised with some hardcore fucking rock. in case you’re wondering, the second song i played was this one. i don’t know what else to say other than coalesce rocks ass. and i’ve had a renewed appreciation for them since my buddy spencer told me they were touring this spring (mere hours before i read it on brian’s page), encouraging me to whip out the cd again and give it further listening–i had acquired it a few months ago at spencer’s urging. my conclusions are that yes, this album still rocks me like i am seldom rocked, and yes, i absolutely must see them when they come to LA in a few months. oh good lord it will be good.

so they have the privilege of being the double song of the week, of kicking my ass, and of encapsulating the feeling of being free of the worst class of all time with the tunes “jesus in the year 2000” and “cowards.com”.

metal signs ready–go.

a final exam at 8am? are you kidding me? that has to be the worst idea i’ve heard all week.

i guess that means that since i’ll have to get up at seven in the morning, i should probably get some sleep while i can. and that’s only the first of two tests tomorrow. ugh.

but wait… hey mercedes concert in the evening? i think so! see how well things work out if you’re a nice boy?

well my computer project is done saving the fact i have to burn it to a cd. and tonight is the dreaded pre-finance-final studying night. uh oh. this is going to be the least fun part of the week. probably even less fun that actually taking the test. at least then i can look at the clock and say to myself, “in X number of minutes, it will all be over forever whether i do badly or not”. honestly, tomorrow afternoon, walking out of that test, will be one of the most liberating experiences i’ve had in years. i sure do hate that class.

other news: i put up our little christmas tree last week–a 20 inch, brightly lit little symbol of my goodwill toward man. or goodwill toward my roommates and our few friends, i should say, because mankind is kind of stupid. but that’s not the point. i boxed and wrapped all my gifts for them and put them not so much under (since it’s so small), but sort of around the little tree on the counter separating kitchen and living room. it’s funny though because the stacks of boxes are easily taller than the tree itself, and the whole scene is just sort of funny. it almost makes you feel sorry for the poor, dwarfed little thing.

or sorry for me, because you’ll notice that all the presents are FROM me, with none TOO me, as i am the only roommate both responsible and caring enough to have taken care of the shopping issue. and we all leave this coming weekend. i just know i’m going to get a bunch of gas-station candy or school-bookstore-paraphernalia that are the sad and obvious trademarks of the last minute shopper. but it’s about the giving, and the loving, not the receiving, right?

grrrr.

i spent over five hours in a row monday afternoon on a computer for my programming class, and then probably another 5 hours monday evening (tonight, that is) preparing for a marketing final. what the hell is with today. now i’m tired and cranky, and sore from hunching over things all day, and i need a backrub probably more than i’ve ever needed any other physical satisfaction of any kind but have no one to help me out with that problem.

oh man. i need to just go to bed pronto.

on the plus side, disk 2 of drukqs is just as good as disc one. that’s some tasty techno tunes right there.

what am i doing writing this anyway? jesus. tear yourself away, man.

goodnight.

i’m such a slacker today, blogwise. maybe it’s because i got up and then spent about 5 and a half straight hours in a lab working on my final project for my computer class. it’s getting somewhere pretty acceptable though so i can’t be too sad. it was time well spent.

then i grabbed a cheeseburger and came home to find my new cd’s in the mailbox. excellent. sunny day real estate, a coalesce cd i already had in its entirety on my computer but finally actually bought (i like to support killer bands like this one), and last but not least the new aphex twin cd. that’s the only one i’ve listened to so far this afternoon too, and HOLY christmas, is it good. i love this guy’s work so much i just want to do a spastic dance of joy. some of his best stuff ever, i think.

if only i didn’t have to spend my evening studying for an exam, i would be in a shining golden place right now, mood-wise, but i guess we can’t win ’em all. at least it won’t be too hard or stressful.

oh, and have you noticed the non-commercial nature of the webpage all of the sudden? someone very special bought me the odd but delightful christmas gift of having a cleaner website. how fun. i guess you could say collapsing is now sponsored by kate. hope you’re enjoying it.

the overexposure in the little picture of me on the right was bugging me, so i replaced it. now you can see what my chin looks like. lucky you.

is it conceited or vain to have a picture of myself up at all? i wonder about that. but i feel like it makes sense to give you some idea of the face to put with the ideas, so that i’m not just some abstract entity whose voice you’re hearing/reading, but a real person you can imagine talking to. i don’t know. i just don’t want anyone to think i’m showing myself off. it’s really so that on the off chance anyone reads this and sees me afterward, they can point and laugh at the right person.

i do wonder what people think about this though, so if you have an opinion please share it.

we just played some informal soccer with a group of seven. it was fun but i realized that i’m not very good or in very good shape. i can run alright as long as i only have to run across a street, for example. or maybe down a hallway. running all over the place for an hour playing soccer is something i’m in no condition to do. i liked my prior definition of “in shape” as “not flabby”. that i can live up to. running takes all this work.

can’t say anything on the agenda for tonight will likely be what i really wish i was doing. but i can’t say what that is either because it wouldn’t help anything.

i’m kinda dirty and am going to shower before i feast on toaster oven chicken nuggets. party on folks.

lots of folks have been stopping by here lately i see. must keep up the good work.

last night i went out to eat with a handful of kiddies to ed debevics…the gimmick wears thin, sure, but it’s pretty cheap and they have the most excellent chicken fingers. and free refills on vanilla coke to boot, which if i were a deity of some sort would be the the official flavor of ambrosia. oh man, i wish i could hold more liquid in my slim little body just so i could drink 8 glasses of vanilla coke over the course of a meal. yum yum.

so that was a nice start to the evening which ended up going nowhere. the rest of the night consisted of three of us either playing grand theft auto or watching someone else play, while josh, dom and i just sat around and “shot the shit”, as they say. it would have been one of those nights that makes you kind of look at yourself and wonder why you don’t have more of a life, except that hanging out with those guys is never a sad thing even when it should be. they’re just too great. i could probably never make another great friend in my life, but if i had these guys around that i have now, i think i’d be pretty set. so the night that was boring on the surface was actually fine by me.

too bad dom and my roommate mike are both leaving next semester along with the coolest girl i’ve met here and probably ever will. but we try not to think about that, or let it dampen the fun of this last week before they take off not to be seen until next summer. it’s just not a cheerful thing to think about.

i almost forgot! this is exciting–i preordered my copy of rejected from bitterfilms.com. this is the coolest animated short ever and i think it’s worth the twenty bucks to own it on dvd. i’m really excited and will probably have a public showing of it sometime soon after it comes… i want everyone to appreciate the fine work of art that is stick figure animation at its finest.

if you have 20 extra bucks lying around or want to get someone a great random but cool gift (that may not necessarily arrive before christmas), i recommend this to anyone.

so i didn’t make it right back here to blog when class was over. why don’t you cry about it.

or you can smile at these nice thoughts here. on the way to class this morning i was skating along the wide sidewalk that runs toward campus alongside one of the big apartment complexes. walking toward me was a large group of pre-schoolers in matching yellow shirts, holding hands in buddy system fashion, led by a few teachers. i heard some of the kids from a ways off say something about a skateboard, and then when i got closer, at least two thirds of this group of cute, cute little kids all started waving and smiling at me, saying “hiiiiiiiiiiii”, like little kids do. so it must have been at least 20 cute little faces looking at me being totally innocent and friendly. how could you not smile and feel good at something like that? i waved back and said hi to all of them with a whopping big grin, let me tell you.

and class is done with (nice), and i blew off work this afternoon (score), which i justified by the fact that they’re making me work 7 hours during finals week (burn). but at least it’s the weekend (sweet) and i don’t have any work i need to start doing until monday afternoon (tight) and i get to go see what should be a fantastic saves the day/ hey mercedes concert on wednesday (rock). so i’m feeling pretty good right now.

plus i just finished wrapping all but one of the christmas presents i bought for my friends (one is still in transit via mail), and i just set them out around our shiny little tree. wrapping presents made me feel all happy and generous and holiday spirited too. so today is just smile after smile. nice change of pace.

just try not to think about how good your ex-girlfriend looked today and you’ll be fine, champ. haha.