this morning i had a very waking life moment (which was my favorite movie of the year, i decided, beating out tenenbaums, wet hot american summer, amelie, how high, and all the other outstanding films from this year, along with the multitudes of awful ones like that royal whopper of a disappointment, planet of the apes).

i’m assuming you have probably heard of lucid dreaming, that is, having a dream in which you know you are dreaming and take control of the events in your dream. well, i’ve heard about this but never experienced it before in my life. today, after a couple of other regular dreams (i slept in pretty late), i was having a dream with a motif similar to some dreams i’ve had before, but which i will not attempt to describe because it just wouldn’t make sense. anyway, dream-brian — as i will call the me in my dreams to make the telling of this less confusing — was washing his hands in a bathroom and saw himself in a mirror, and said to himself, in the dream, “i love when i have dreams like this” (referring to the repeated dream motif). at that point, dream brian thought to himself, “hey wait, i just realized that i’m dreaming! that means i can do whatever i want!” at this point dream-brian got very excited, because he’d never had this sort of experience before. he left the bathroom and went into the main room of the house he was in, and of course, began thinking about what any guy in this i-can-do-anything-i-want situation would start thinking about…

that’s right.

so as dream-brian is mulling over who the lucky lady will be, and very interested to see how this all works out in this newly discovered state, dream-brian thought to himself, “geez, i sure hope i don’t wake up…”

which of course trailed off into me waking up. i opened my eyes nervously and was sad to see that yes, i had ruined everything. i’ve never been that frustrated with the plain fact that i was awake before. what a rip off. i really tried to go back to sleep soon enough and pick up where i left off but we all knew that wasn’t going to work.

(sigh)…well, i suppose my interactions with supermodels will have to be limited to daydreams for the time being. so it goes.