yesterday i was reading this fun ny times article on the prevalence of risque girls’ costumes when it comes to be halloween time. although it seems one part ‘isn’t this all a little bit obvious?’ and one part ‘you’ve got to be kidding yourselves’, i love it overall just because it’s a topic so ripe for debate. are girls playing into subservient gender stereotypes or taking control of their femininity? or is all that an over-dramatization of a subtext that isn’t really there, because it’s just fun to let loose and be scandalous for a day when normally you couldn’t get away with it? ooo, i can’t wait to feed this up to a group of girls and get them all up in arms about it. maybe the ones who are angry are really just the ones who can’t pull off a proper french maid or daisy duke ensemble? not that i believe that; it’s just funny to think how upset some people might be at the assertion.

i think the question that doesn’t get nearly enough attention is the male counterpart to this issue: whether the available choices are socially and morally responsible or not, it’s SO EASY for girls to pick a halloween costume. they can go as any profession, fictional character, etc., sex it up a little bit, and then when they arrive at the halloween party of their choice, people will go ‘oooooo, nice costume’.

i, on the other hand, could never unbutton a dress shirt a little lower than normal, or wear short shorts, and have people flirting with me as a result. dammit, why can’t girls be as horny and easily pleased as guys, so i can just be lazy and bare more skin and consider the holiday a success? the holiday is so unfair to men. instead i have to try to be clever and creative and a bunch of bullshit like that when i’d much rather just objectify myself to gain the approval of the opposite sex. god, being a guy is such a ripoff.

and if i wasn’t pressured enough, not only has my date subverted the easy way out of being a “naughty-fill-in-the-blank” for halloween, but she’s had a clever and creative costume picked out for months already! how could i possibly live up to that, without having put any thought or effort into the matter with only a week remaining?

grown-up halloween is so lame. i just want to get a k-mart plastic monster mask and sprint door-to-door in an effort to fill a pillowcase with candy. like the holiday was intended to be celebrated.